My online journal sharing interests in photography, nature, coffee life, journaling, fountain pens, bicycling, spirituality and asking deep questions.
“Fear, like any other strong emotion, can make us exquisitely conscious of living, perfectly aware of being in the moment. It can only do that, however, on those rare occasions when we don’t try to fight it, run away from it, cope with it, suppress it, tame it, or otherwise domesticate it.”
Gerald May
I read a statement by Ilia Delio that says, “We are not called to maintain the existing order but to engage disorder as it lingers on the edge of new order.” Somehow that resonates with me. Seems nature is that way. Instead of accepting the chaos that is a part of my life, I want and try to keep things in order. Which doesn’t happen. What many consider chaos in nature is really the change, growth, transformation, metamorphosis, where something new is arriving. At the present I’m living with a certain level of anxiety, uncertainty, and doing my best to embrace faith, trust, hope, acceptance and even surrender. Let’s call it living this spiritual adventure.
It has been overcast all day. The eclair in the above image is called an almond apricot eclair. I’ve never had one before today. It has an almond cream filling with apricot preserves over the top. Not as rich as I expected but had that sweetness that excited my taste buds. I will probably need to collect more data for my final analysis. Hope you had a good weekend! Stay warm!
Made a trip to the coffee shop this morning for
mws
a much needed dose of medicine in my recovery
I was greeted with the beautiful smiles
of Logan and Nate, over two weeks without them
Nate brings me this cortado with his special touch,
a cute pigs face made of frothy milk, now I smile
Soft music lets the din of people’s conversations to dominate
comforting me with voices and smiles from people I do not know
I watch as a woman, pregnant with child, sits at a nearby table,
reading her book with a cup of coffee, its steam rising in the sunlight
I journal from my favorite chair where the sun warms me,
these sacred moments somehow bring comfort and serenity
So this morning I accepted the gift of a smile from my baristas
holding their smile within me and offering the gift of my own smile
Yes, the gift of a smile…
PS: Sorry for the poor depth of field in the image.
It seems to me that a life well-lived is one in which we find light in unexpected places and look long enough into the shadows that we find mystery, not fear.
David DuChemin
Like the joy of the sea coming home to shore,
John O’Donohue
May the relief of laughter rinse through your soul.
As the wind loves to call things to dance,
May your gravity be lightened by grace.
Like the dignity of moonlight restoring the earth,
May your thoughts incline with reverence and respect.
As water takes whatever shape it is in,
So free may you be about who you become.
As silence smiles on the other side of what’s said,
May your sense of irony bring perspective.
As time remains free of all that it frames,
May your mind stay clear of all it names.
May your prayer of listening deepen enough
to hear in the depths the laughter of god.
Another cold morning of 5 degrees at 6:30 am. Sometimes on mornings like this I wonder if I need to move to a warmer climate. Then realize we really do not have days like this very often. Even though you may hear me whine I still can manage to rise before dawn, have my quiet time then go to sacred places to experience the predawn light and sunrise or meander to a coffee shop or both. I live a good life with all its difficulties and joys. I have much to be grateful for. And when I do hear myself whine I am able to listen deeply enough to hear and experience God laughing with me and within me. I’m then not as cold. The image is pre dawn light at Pineridge Natural Area taken last week because this morning I only meandered to the coffee shop. 😂
This morning I noticed a young man in his early thirties strutting into the coffee shop1I am aware that I was immediately judgmental of him but this brought up some wonderful questions to ask myself and journal about it. His entrance was noticeable because of his tough guy walk. The demeanor offered a feeling of toughness, don’t mess with me attitude. Nor was I the only one who turned and noticed. As he ordered his drink it was then that I noticed he was packing a gun on his right side. So, the next time I see a police officer walk into a coffee shop wearing their weapons I’ll check to see if they have the same strut.
Anyway, this gave me some fodder for my journaling and also stirred this posting. What or who is he afraid of? Was his reality of life that foundationally scary and insecure? Did he feel the half dozen customers were possible enemies and that he needed to protect himself at any cost? I personally have never in my 20 some years of coffee shop life encountered a wild beast in a coffee shop. I have seen a dog or two. About the only life they could point a weapon at is another person.
My reality of life presents something different. Seems I have more fear, and am at a greater risk, from the driver who is trying to text message and drive at the same time than I do of being shot in a coffee shop. And, I also have more fear of politicians, corporate executives, and the wealthy who will do anything to attain more money, power and control due to the fear they will lose what they have or not attain what they want. And, in all honesty, I have a fear of the person packing the gun and how they will use the weapon under a stressful situation, will they use it with reactionary fear.
To end this post I must say we have no idea of the life experiences, the physical, sexual, verbal, emotional abuse and violence, others have had in life that presents their reality of life as threatening. So in my journaling and writing of this post I find gratitude for the life I have lived, the safety and security my family and community gave me and continue to give me and the innate goodness I see in this world. Reaffirms my belief that packing a gun will not prevent violence or put an end to violence and damn sure it will not bring peace.
reading in the quiet of predawnÂ
ms
leads to reflection and contemplationÂ
…the gift of this day
our soul needs these ritualsÂ
as we offer our limitations and gifts
…the gift of this day
in these sacred moments we discoverÂ
in the ground of our very being we are love
…the gift of this day