• lifestyles,  quotes,  writing/reading

    A Chapter has Ended

    Easter morning – Monte, Mom, Sheree, Marcee

    “You don’t go around grieving all the time, but the grief is still there
    and always will be.”

    Nigella Lawson

    The constant sound of the pulsating oxygen concentrator is silent. A quiet has settled over the room. My mother died peacefully early this morning, Her suffering has ended. I will miss her.

    A large weight has been lifted from my 92 year old father who now faces the painful absence of a spouse of 72 years. We will all be there for him, and each other, as we go through our own grieving process to find some peacefulness and serenity that we’ve been missing for several weeks.

    This will not be a wordy post or any attempt at expressing how I feel at the moment because I’m not sure how I feel. There’s a sense I will probably process her life and death for the rest of my life. And to be honest, I actually look forward to that. I again thank all of you for your thoughts, prayers and well wishes you have offered my family.

  • haiku,  lake,  landscape,  natural areas,  sunrises,  writing/reading

    Cloudless Sky

    cloudless eastern sky
    night departs new day begins
    peaceful time of day

    ms

    Not a cloud to be seen from the north to the south this morning. No wind. Very quiet and calming at the natural area. I find these experiences bring serenity and a peace to the world within me. Wish more of the world would start their day with moments like this. Time with nature.

  • clouds,  landscape,  natural areas,  seasons,  sunrises,  winter scenes

    Another Sunrise

    What’s broken can be mended.
    What hurts can be healed.
    And no matter how dark it gets,
    The sun is going to rise again.

    Well, back to another sunrise. Took this image yesterday but this one is a bit different. I arrived at predawn when the sky was pink and took a few images of those colors. It was 18 degrees and a slight breeze from the northwest. What is different about this image is the young lady located in the lower left corner of the image. She is sitting on a small bench at the trailhead, wrapped in a blanket and sipping on a thermos of hot coffee or maybe tea. I was there about 45 minutes and she was there when I arrived, sitting on that bench the whole time. We watched this lovely sunrise as well as seeing a couple coyotes walk across the frozen reservoir in search of food. We did not talk. Not sure the reason she needed to be there but for me nature is a place to go when I need to find healing, answers, peace, serenity, silence, a boost, even a good cry and most often the need to slow down the chatter of my thinking. It had warmed up to 19 degrees by the time she left. I departed soon after. We’re expecting light snow today so right now it is overcast and windy. Happy Friday!

  • landscape,  shadows,  snow,  trees,  winter scenes

    Listening to the Voices

    Soft subtle shadows on undisturbed snow

    “One way God connects us to nature is through giving us the capacity to appreciate and be fascinated by its beauty. We find nature marked by such patterns as simplicity, harmony, balance, and a mysterious quality of vibrancy.” Tilden Edwards 

    I stopped in awe and took in the wonder of this tranquil scene yesterday morning after Friday’s snowfall. It was the shadows and the undisturbed snow that called to me. I like to think of it as an inaudible voice heard deep within me. I was a bit surprised to find this large of an area of undisturbed snow with no tracks and painted with soft long early morning shadows. As you may well know I am drawn to these scenes. I find a beauty and serenity that touches somewhere within me, especially when I find it in a busy city, or in this case a college campus. I’m not sure I set out searching for them as much as it seems they are presented, or gifted to me. However, I must be aware of the world around me, listening to the voice within and have my camera with me.

  • clouds,  landscape,  prairie,  snow,  sunrises

    Life is not like that…

    Sunrise in eastern Colorado

    I felt a strong emotion rise to the surface while on my bus ride this morning. Tears welled up in my eyes, not from sadness or pain but more along the lines of some feeling of love. What is strange about this feeling of love is because of an incident of anger that happened 15 minutes earlier while leaving the condo. I was running a couple minutes late and if I didn’t hustle I would miss the bus which would cause me to have to wait a half hour for the next bus. As I grabbed the doorknob I remembered I needed to get my renewed bus pass out of the pocket of my backpack and felt the anxiety within. As I took the backpack off I got tangled up with the straps and my anxiety burst into anger and choice words (#@&!). Almost immediately after hearing the words come out of my mouth and noticed my  increased emotions, I took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled. I ask myself what was I really angry at? It was sure not the backpacks fault. This led to a few moments of reflection. While walking to the bus stop I became aware of how much I wanted the world to run smoothly all the time, especially for me. But, the reality is life is not like that.

    Then while on the bus I observed these students solemnly heading to class and wondered what they may be going through. I could see some to be stressed out with school or worried about some relationship that is struggling. Maybe there are health problems in their life, theirs or family. No one’s life runs smoothly all the time nor is there a reason to expect it. The real question is how we face and deal with life. For me the feeling of love on the bus was for those who may be going through much more than getting tangled up their backpack. I have much to learn. Sigh! If you read this far, thanks for listening.

  • Black and White,  flowers,  lifestyles,  Plants,  writing/reading

    Acceptance and Gratitude

    Daises on Campus
    Daisies on Campus

    There are days when my inner peace is troubled or just not there. It can be due to the political environment and struggles of our world, a troubled relationship in my life, my weight, a task I really do not want to do, traffic, road construction, money (the lack of it). I could go on but I’m sure you have your own list. Sometimes I find myself thinking I’d have more peace if I did more walking, got more rest, spent more time in prayer and mediation, more solitude, more….  a lack of something? Then at some moment of clarity I stop and laugh at myself. More is not my answer, although this culture wants to convince me it is. I’ve come to realize it’s not the wants that bring peace and serenity but it’s the acceptance and gratitude of what I already have. And, maybe having less will allow more peace, letting go of something(s). 

  • Plants,  quotes,  spirituality

    A Spiritual Way of Life

    20090427-_dsc9512
    Spiritual Light

    “If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know  peace, No matter how far down the scale we have  gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others, That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.” Alcoholics Anonymous