self-centered – Monte Stevens Blog

To live without self-centered expectations is the secret of freedom in personal relationships.
Eknath Easwaran

This was the scene when I walked into my condo this morning. Scenes like this are common with this time of the year. It’s almost impossible to keep my floors clean. Yesterday afternoon I stood on my porch and watched with wonder as trees let go of the leaves allowing them to freefall on to the next stage of their lives. I was amazed at how many and how fast they were falling. The slight breeze would send a wave of them across the yard. All of a sudden a gust of wind came up and a pile of them would circle me on my porch. The rustling music the leaves make is soothing to me. I smiled. Now I need to sweep my floor. May you enjoy all your personal relationships today.

Early morning light through my front-room window

“A shadow is never created in darkness. It is born of light. We can be blind to it and blinded by it. Our shadow asks us to look at what we don’t want to see”
Terry Tempest Williams

There is a dark side of me I that I did not always want to see or admit to knowing about. It’s a side that can be full of hate, anger, jealousy, envy, fear, insecurity, self-centeredness, and the list goes on. I imagine everyone could also add to this list. When I was younger I avoided looking inward, always had a focus on how I wanted you to see me outwardly. I am grateful for this time in my life where I use self-examination along with prayer and meditation as the light to acknowledge and face the shadow side of myself. It is a path of self discovery.

… need to sweep my floor

Self Discovery