“Don’t believe everything you think. When your mind starts to stack up its stories to prove to you that you have been wronged or you have been wrong, that nobody loves you or that everybody wants something from you, take a deep breath. Remind yourself that just because you think something doesn’t make it true.”
Mirabai Starr, God of Love
I’ve watched peoples feathers get ruffled when I say we can’t believe everything we think, nor believe what we think to be reality. Primarily because it’s difficult to change/let go of unhealthy thinking. We justify the heck out of our destructive thoughts with other unhealthy thinking. Let that soak in. Byron Katie suggests, “A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It’s not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering. Attaching to a thought means believing that it’s true, without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.” I’m finding detaching from my thoughts to be freeing, a lifelong practice, and enriching my life. I often laugh at myself, seldom beating myself up. However, I do have wishful thoughts that more people practiced detaching from their thoughts starting with politicians, leaders of religious institutions, corporate executives, well, anyone centered on self, and ….. There I go again, believing I know what’s best for others, for the world!!! Happy Saturday!
6 Comments
Earl
I had to take some time processing and digesting this post, and I don’t know how to express my opinions without stating beliefs that may or may not be based upon incomplete or faulty information. ~grin~ Is a belief the same as a conclusion? According to the dictionary, a conclusion is a “deduction, inference, interpretation, reasoning; opinion, judgment, decision, diagnosis, verdict, determination; assumption, presumption, supposition, conjecture, surmise.” A conclusion seems less absolute than a belief and may be dynamic depending on new data, information or considerations. A ‘belief’ seems to allow for leaps of faith, whereas a conclusion relies more on fact. So perhaps your statements are simply conclusions based upon your current information, or maybe I’m nit-picking. LOL (Hopefully, some of this makes sense.)
Monte Stevens
I have also needed time to process your comment and reflect on what I actually wrote. This would be one of those times I wish we had the opportunity to sit at a coffee shop, discussing this for a couple of hours. Definitely inviting Bonnie to add her input.
I agree that a conclusion is based on facts and hopefully that are not assumptions or manipulated facts. When we believe our thoughts to be the truth because we are focused on our self-centeredness or assuming we know what’s best for someone else, is where I need to detach from those thoughts. I’ve come to understand that my facts, my common sense, my view of the world, and my life experiences are not the same as others. Maybe it has more to do with not attaching to our first thoughts but taking time to find out if they are valid. We all can quickly, and sometimes falsely, make very invalid assumptions of a homeless person, an erratic driver, or the slight headache we assume will go away but in fact is letting us know we have a brain tumor. In a valid way what I see some people doing is based on current information that I see. When I see how some people live life based on their thoughts that are not reality, then yes I am making a conclusion. Thank you for your comment as it really has helped me shift a bit of my understanding of beliefs and conclusions. Hope you have a great day, my friend!
Earl
Perhaps you’ve statement about shifting of understanding captures an essential here. We should acknowledge there are rarely any black-and-white truths and be willing to adapt our perspectives accordingly. Instead of considering this flexibility a flaw, we should recognize it as a valuable and reasonable asset.
That would be a good coffee shop discussion, and Bonnie would undoubtedly be a plus. She keeps me on my toes when I exhibit “lazy thinking.”
Monte Stevens
Way to go Bonnie!
Mark
I do like testing my own thoughts and feelings – trying to keep myself in check or at least try to confirm the why’s. But even if I can tolerate such a thing, not may others do – like you say – feathers ruffled. So while it may seem like a good thing to practice, implementation has its difficulties. 🙂
Monte Stevens
Yes, that implementation is a tough one!!