My online journal where I share my interests in photography, nature, journaling, fountain pens, bicycling, coffee life, spirituality and the mystery of it all.
As I walked into Starry Night Espresso Cafe this morning I realized I was the only male among about 10 women. I could tell there were some good conversations all around me, the din was up and a few hands were waving in the air in an attempt to help in each conversation. I had to ask Chelsea if I was allowed in there or was it a girls only Saturday. She laughed then made up this mocha latte for me showing her skill in latte art. By the time I left an hour and a half later there was standing room only. Don’t know that I’ve seen it that busy as the baristas were bustin butt making drinks and food. When I return from that busy morning at the coffee shop there was an added sense of quiet and appreciation in my condo.
Had my meeting with the TAVR surgeon on Friday and we will be doing a VIV TAVR procedure on March 14th. This will be a less invasive option to open heart surgery where they will insert a catheter in my artery at my groin up to my heart then expand the new valve inside the valve installed four years ago. Glad I have a decision made and consensus that we all agree on.
It is bitter cold this morning. My weather app said it was 3 degrees and my car’s dashboard said 3 degrees when I left for the coffee shop at 7:02 am. Two hours later it says zero degrees. It’s going the wrong way. We are looking at 2-3 days of this cold. I’m home and in for the rest of the day!!! Okay, enough about the cold and on to something new.
This something new is a new Pelikan M205 Apatite Special Edition Demonstrator fountain pen. This past year Pelikan announced the Edelstein Apatite ink for 2022. Since I’ve been pleased with the seven Pelikan pens I already have, I didn’t even know this new ink or pen had come out until a week ago. After all, I can only write with one pen at a time. 😳 Needless to say, I fell in love with this color immediately. The pen is the newest in a series of eight demonstrator pens they have come out with since 2015. I only have one other demonstrator, the Smoky Quartz, which came out in 2017. All my other M200x pens are a marble swirl. Pelikan calls the Apatite color a Turquoise-Blue and is part of the M205 series which has the silver trim rather than gold. It is also a part of their gemstone inspired models that have been a popular mainstay of the company’s annual line-up. Apatite is a phosphate mineral which was first discovered in 1786 by the German geologist A.G. Werner. As a demonstrator pen you are able to see the internal piston and ink which I like. 👍 Being a special edition the price was higher than I wanted but…. So far I like the looks of the pen, the nib (medium) writes wonderfully and the ink shades well while pleasing to my eyes. So, my task now is to find all the words hidden within this pen by putting pen to paper in my journals. Enough gibberish from me. Stay warm and enjoy your day!!
“Fear, like any other strong emotion, can make us exquisitely conscious of living, perfectly aware of being in the moment. It can only do that, however, on those rare occasions when we don’t try to fight it, run away from it, cope with it, suppress it, tame it, or otherwise domesticate it.”
I read a statement by Ilia Delio that says, “We are not called to maintain the existing order but to engage disorder as it lingers on the edge of new order.” Somehow that resonates with me. Seems nature is that way. Instead of accepting the chaos that is a part of my life, I want and try to keep things in order. Which doesn’t happen. What many consider chaos in nature is really the change, growth, transformation, metamorphosis, where something new is arriving. At the present I’m living with a certain level of anxiety, uncertainty, and doing my best to embrace faith, trust, hope, acceptance and even surrender. Let’s call it living this spiritual adventure.
It has been overcast all day. The eclair in the above image is called an almond apricot eclair. I’ve never had one before today. It has an almond cream filling with apricot preserves over the top. Not as rich as I expected but had that sweetness that excited my taste buds. I will probably need to collect more data for my final analysis. Hope you had a good weekend! Stay warm!
It seems to me that a life well-lived is one in which we find light in unexpected places and look long enough into the shadows that we find mystery, not fear.
Like the joy of the sea coming home to shore, May the relief of laughter rinse through your soul.
As the wind loves to call things to dance, May your gravity be lightened by grace.
Like the dignity of moonlight restoring the earth, May your thoughts incline with reverence and respect.
As water takes whatever shape it is in, So free may you be about who you become.
As silence smiles on the other side of what’s said, May your sense of irony bring perspective.
As time remains free of all that it frames, May your mind stay clear of all it names.
May your prayer of listening deepen enough to hear in the depths the laughter of god.
John O’Donohue
Another cold morning of 5 degrees at 6:30 am. Sometimes on mornings like this I wonder if I need to move to a warmer climate. Then realize we really do not have days like this very often. Even though you may hear me whine I still can manage to rise before dawn, have my quiet time then go to sacred places to experience the predawn light and sunrise or meander to a coffee shop or both. I live a good life with all its difficulties and joys. I have much to be grateful for. And when I do hear myself whine I am able to listen deeply enough to hear and experience God laughing with me and within me. I’m then not as cold. The image is pre dawn light at Pineridge Natural Area taken last week because this morning I only meandered to the coffee shop. 😂
This morning I noticed a young man in his early thirties strutting into the coffee shopI am aware that I was immediately judgmental of him but this brought up some wonderful questions to ask myself and journal about it. His entrance was noticeable because of his tough guy walk. The demeanor offered a feeling of toughness, don’t mess with me attitude. Nor was I the only one who turned and noticed. As he ordered his drink it was then that I noticed he was packing a gun on his right side. So, the next time I see a police officer walk into a coffee shop wearing their weapons I’ll check to see if they have the same strut.
Anyway, this gave me some fodder for my journaling and also stirred this posting. What or who is he afraid of? Was his reality of life that foundationally scary and insecure? Did he feel the half dozen customers were possible enemies and that he needed to protect himself at any cost? I personally have never in my 20 some years of coffee shop life encountered a wild beast in a coffee shop. I have seen a dog or two. About the only life they could point a weapon at is another person.
My reality of life presents something different. Seems I have more fear, and am at a greater risk, from the driver who is trying to text message and drive at the same time than I do of being shot in a coffee shop. And, I also have more fear of politicians, corporate executives, and the wealthy who will do anything to attain more money, power and control due to the fear they will lose what they have or not attain what they want. And, in all honesty, I have a fear of the person packing the gun and how they will use the weapon under a stressful situation, will they use it with reactionary fear.
To end this post I must say we have no idea of the life experiences, the physical, sexual, verbal, emotional abuse and violence, others have had in life that presents their reality of life as threatening. So in my journaling and writing of this post I find gratitude for the life I have lived, the safety and security my family and community gave me and continue to give me and the innate goodness I see in this world. Reaffirms my belief that packing a gun will not prevent violence or put an end to violence and damn sure it will not bring peace.
Received my two books that will be Christmas Gifts for my children and grandchildren. I spent the past two days proofing them and then ordered copies yesterday morning. They turned out okay and are simple 7×7 inch softcover photo books. One photo on the left page and a small paragraph or poem on the left page. One book is 60 pages and the other is 64 pages. I do enjoy making these small books, like the final product as I don’t print and frame that many images. This is a good way to archive some of my images and share them. I used Blurb in Lightroom because it’s easy to do photo books. However, any text work is awkward.
Happy Birthday to my oldest daughter, Christine!!!!
